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Big Deal
Just quickly, Simon Doonan at the New York Observer has a piece about low-key pregnancy in the face of pregnancy and baby obsession. It's a little too bad all of the people he chats up are sour to the point of nastiness, but I agree with the general impulse. For a whole host of reasons, I had an impossible time talking about my pregnancy with people I didn't know very well so I didn't say anything.
At about week 39 I ran into one of the Dog People who had clearly been away on a winter vacation and he yelled down the block as he saw me approach: "What the Hell happened to you?!" I told him that if you spend too much time in the sun you miss things in darkest Manhattan.
I don't think pregnancy secrecy needs to be a whole campaign and another reason for people to look down on those who are more excitable, more comfortable and less superstitious. But it is nice to hear that my approach to having a child (which I'll call the "La La La I Can't Hear You" Strategy) isn't mine alone.
The piece is worth it for this line alone: "Along with the fetishization of reproduction, the other thing that needs to go is the self-flagellating "look-how-quickly-I-got-my-figure-back" exhibitionism."
I know no one will believe him, but just seeing it in print is a relief.
posted by Elise at 9:10 AM
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said...
Thank you for posting this. I agree that keeping quiet and wanting peace and quiet from anooying well-meaning comments and privacy intrusions seems to be so subversive. I had my son at 18 and I come from a strict Italian family, so things were pretty hush-hush, for different reasons... but I desire to keep future pregnancies simple and quiet for eventual babies too...
6/22/2006 8:12 AM
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Comments and other inquiries can be most unwelcome, particularly when most women have mixed feelings about their first pregnancies. In this culture you are looked at strangely if you are not constantly glowing and the epitome of happiness and love throughout your pregnancy. People inevitably think "bad mother".
7/02/2006 8:26 PM
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