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Thrills n' Chills
I'm still on the fence about whether or not to introduce the Felix to the actual practice of trick-or-treating tonight (is there any received wisdom about that?)... but if I can stuff the kids into them again, the costumes are going to get some more use.
Happy Halloween
posted by Elise at 7:25 AM
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The Shame of Store Bought
About a month ago, Felix started saying that he wanted to be a pumpkin for Halloween. Naturally I didn't take him seriously. He's not yet three. Anyone who makes any kind of investment of time or money or energy based on the fluctuating whims of a small child is some kind of masochist.
But I did mention his interest to a friend, saying that I was pleased he wasn't yet under the sway of cartoon characters (I have nothing against them, particularly, but I happen to like non-character costumes better). Anyway, my friend immediately told me that I was lucky because "pumpkin" is an easy costume to make, and she told me how.
And I forgot everything she said because I figured he would change his mind anyway.
As it turns out, he didn't change his mind. I have a pumpkin on my hands. And a store bought costume. This is a matter of some controversy, as Emily Bazelon writes in Slate (she's pro-store bought). I know many people who, for reasons of politics or craftiness or tradition or philosophy refuse to buy costumes and they give me pause. You see, I am from a home-made costume family. My mother was not one of those people who would spend weeks measuring and sewing. Her talent lay in making a good costume out of things that were handy and pulling it all together with a minimum of fuss and wasted time. I recall a fantastic mask made of construction paper and cotton balls, paired with a sheerling jacket turned inside-out to become a sheep (not a rain-proof one), and a really great Catwoman getup (also featuring construction paper). But I am harried and not so handy.
So I turned a blind eye. I told my husband that Felix wanted to be a pumpkin (after waiting long enough to be sure that this wasn't some passing fancy) and let him deal with it. It arrived in the mail. Sebastian is doing what I suppose a fair number of second children whose parents didn't make an outfit out of construction paper do: he is wearing his brother's first Halloween costume. I'm short on time, high on sugar... remember that bucket o' treats left at my door? It's been my nighttime companion.
posted by Elise at 6:17 AM
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Unfashionable Children
Or rather: Will having children make you horribly gauche? "Oui," says at least one French woman who is trying to get her book No Kid: 40 Reasons Not to Have Children published in the United States.
Today the New York Observer reports on the book and the general yuckiness of kiddie love and I have to say, I don't understand it really. I love a good polemic as much as the next person, but honestly, having done it twice, I can't believe people would have a child for fashion. And as for the argument that having a kid makes you unproductive, I can't say that's been my experience. Between the births of my children I sold and wrote a book. People I know have started small businesses after the birth of their children, embarked on new careers, designed houses in odd locations, and if one thinks about the big picture, Hillary Clinton isn't letting the fact that she is a mother interrupt her bid for the presidency.
I also don't see that deciding not to have children is a new thing. I have a large number of friends and relatives who opted out of reproducing and as far as I can tell they have neither had much of a problem with it, nor have they based their decision on a set of contrarian politics.
Maybe I'm just cranky today, but it seems to me that the decision to have or skip kids doesn't make you particularly interesting, so offering a few hundred pages on the subject seems less appealing to me than, say, reading the package inserts on my headache medication
posted by Elise at 8:59 AM
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Stumped!
I opened the front door this morning and prepared to wheel Sebastian out in his stroller with the Felix on foot at my side and the terrier lurching on his leash (my husband is away, which is why a simple morning dog walk turned into a parade) and we were faced with a puzzle in the form of a neighborly Halloween Secret Santa Scenario.
A plastic pumpkin stuffed with Halloween themed items was at my feet and inside were two copies of one singularly unhelpful note about spreading the spirit of the season. I'm assuming I'm supposed to leave my own baskets of spooky items on two more doorsteps-- like a more time consuming chain letter. But, and I hate to say this, I think I"m not smart enough to know exactly what's expected. I don't understand the (really brief) instructions. I don't even really understand the contents of the plastic pumpkin (which imply strongly that I'm planning to host a Halloween party, which would be news to me). While I want to be a good neighbor, this week was not the one in which to plop a bunch of extra errands (shopping for seasonal goodies and cool packages in which to stow them, photocopying the hard-for me- to parse instructions). So now I just feel like a fool for not getting it, and worried about not being a good neighbor while dreading creeping through my building at night, setting dogs barking, while delivering packages to neighbors who will want to punch me for giving them extra work to do. And yet I don't feel comfortable just killing the fun.
Of course, as my brow wrinkled in confusion, Felix began bouncing in delight. This surprise was enchanting, entrancing, amazing... so don't think I'm so much of a sourpuss that I missed his pleasure. It did manage to cut through the fog of "What am I supposed to do about this"-ness that lingers around my head even now.
posted by Elise at 4:16 PM
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In Full Frazz
So things have been a bit wild lately and they're starting to settle a bit, or perhaps I've just thrown in the towel and have unconsciously made peace with being chronically behind.
All parents at Felix's school must bring snack in a few times during the year. That's fair enough. Also fair enough is the fact that another parent was in charge of coordinating all of the dates. Also fair enough is the fact that I volunteered to to a tiny bit of extra snack (one additional day) because it seemed easy enough.
But now the first of my snack days are approaching and my mind is a blank. Actually it is a pit of refined flour. It isn't a mandate, more of a strong suggestion that these things be healthy (except for birthday snack, when cupcakes are acceptable). Nuts are not permitted. And I don't really know what to do. In a moment of panic yesterday while taking out the garbage, I noticed that a neighbor had recycled an issue of Cookie magazine that boasted lots of recipes for healthy taste sensations. I pulled it out (I'm not that proud), thinking it would save me in this first wave of snackage.
And wouldn't you know it, the thing is full of tips from the inescapable Jessica Seinfeld (she's everywhere-- how does she manage it?). There are also suggestions about making treats with gelatin that I don't think would travel so well, and there was something with dates and walnuts that are verboten.
As always I have a sense that I'm fretting too much about this and maybe I could make this problem go away with some bags of Pirate Booty, but I don't want Felix to get the reputation of having a lazy or excessively weird mother, even if it's true.
I still don't think I'll be making any spinach brownies or avocado infused chocolate pudding.
posted by Elise at 6:01 AM
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Blargh!
There is much too much going on at the moment (mostly of the work variety), but I can say that I was somewhat relieved to see that I might not have to feel so bad about not pureeing spinach and baking the slurry into brownies for Felix and his Friends. (I admit that the endless Deceptively Delicious press has been making me feel terribly guilty, in spite of the fact that my son actually likes broccoli-- though he prefers it fresh, which he will tell you is how it always is prepared at Grandma's House, not consistently so at home.)
And for your entertainment, the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene just published its annual lists of baby names (this documents what happened name-wise in 2006). Here is the press release of top 10's (Ashley somehow clawed her way back to #1), and here is the whole huge set of lists.
posted by Elise at 6:49 PM
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For Anyone Looking to Indulge a Martyr Complex
Here's an article for you! Apparently, sons shave some time (34 weeks, or so) off their mother's lives. Now, before you panic too much, the evidence for this was found by a Finnish evolutionary biologist who examined centuries-old birth, marriage and death records.
Does this analysis translate into the twenty-first century? Probably not so much in most developed countries but there are plenty of parts of the world where the Finnish paradigm could easily apply.
posted by Elise at 11:34 AM
1 Comments
Blearily We Roll Along
I am propping myself up quite limply at the moment. It is ridiculous how much I crave just thirty or even forty-five more minutes of sleep that were denied me this morning.
The rush of trying to accommodate all the fragments of obligation I have has left me a bit overwhelmed lately, so I haven't even had an opportunity to read the whole thing, but in light of my state, I feel oblighed to guide you to the sensational headline: "Snooze or Lose: Why Just a Little Lost Sleep Can Set Kids Back Years". The piece is about how reduced sleep causes cognative abilities to droop, and I and terrified to suspect that I'm lliving proof that this issue doesn't ens with the arrival of adulthood.
posted by Elise at 3:31 AM
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Learned Today
Two items, in reverse order of importance:
Apparently mothers are determined to be such self-hating suckers that they have fallen for a plastic surgery marketing ploy called the "Mom Job" (this is probably not actually news since it showed up in the New York Times Style section today, but I am, as always, late-- and not fashionably so-- to the party). Anyway, the "Mom Job" is a little collection of surgeries generally involving a tummy tuck, breast lift (implants optional) and liposuction somewhere. I can safely say that I think this is a lousy "trend" if its real, but my ire is muted because I'm much too close to the birth of my second kid to think clearly about my physical state. But if you're in the mood to cringe a bit, I say read this piece and weep.
Also of note is the surprising discovery made this morning that milk behaves the same way with kiwi fruit as it does with citrus. It curdles.
posted by Elise at 6:48 AM
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Toyland
So I was doing the regular weekend tour of the playground when someone handed me a card and offered Felix a balloon (pink- his choice). The card was an invitation to a Green Toy Party at which I would be able to purchase items not made in China, made of organic materials, with non-lead paints, safe wood, phthalate-free rubber, and are in other ways wholesome, or at least not dangerous.
Is this a thing these days? Is this how responsible parents do their Christmas shopping?
The invitation assures me that this is not the equivalent of a phthalate-free Tupperware party, but the distinction between the two eludes me a bit, in part because I don't really object to Tupperware parties even though I've never been to one. (Truth be told, I've never been invited to one either.)
Anyway, I'm entirely in favor of safety and reasonably pro-wholesome (though someone who consumes as many Red Hots and Necco wafers as I do would be a bit of a hypocrite to call herself virtuous) but I'm also a cynic who wonders a bit if the fears of Chinese-made toys aren't providing opportunities for people interested in making a buck.
There's nothing wrong with that either, of course, and I'm not immune to anxiety-based shopping but I am a bit tired of being told to worry. Frankly, ever since the government tried to get me to stock up on duct tape and plastic sheeting I've been sick of it.
Will I go to this thing? I don't know. It depends on whether or not I want to spring for and can secure a babysitter for the evening. But that is another story entirely.
(And here I will mention but not comment further on the fact that the balloon Felix got when I was handed the invitation was probably not organic and if the lunatic who taught our infant CPR and safety class is to be believed, is a safety nightmare.
Oh. And I also won't comment further on now crappy I felt when I was doing something brusque with the stroller and I snapped the string, which let the Toxic Balloon escape. And don't wag those fingers; I have been picking up extra trash on dog walks as penance. It's an annoying world we live in.)
posted by Elise at 8:07 AM
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